So I haven’t blogged in several days. Life has been crazy busy. However, today I’ll talk a little bit about the current sitiuation. I have Mr. D blocked on all social media, his phone number is blocked and his emails go to my spam folder. Since I’m not responding to him, he messaged my mom on Sunday. He told me my mom it was really important that I call him. So I did. I asked him what he needed. He supossedly just wanted to know if we had court today. He knows we don’t have court, he’s just playing dumb. He just wanted a reason to talk to me. He informed me that he had been trying to reach out to me but for some reason, I wasn’t getting his messages. He acted like he didn’t understand why. So I informed him it was because I had no reason to talk to him. His reply just made me laugh. Mr. D thinks because we were together eight years (it was only seven) that we have plenty to talk about. I informed him that when he decided to screw me and not pay me his share for the last two months of rent and utilities that I payed for, that I chose not to talk to him anymore. When he moved his ex into the house and let her live for free in a house that I paid the bills at, that I chose not to talk to him anymore. I also informed him when he started lying about me and telling people how I opened all these credit cards in his name and left him broke, that I chose to no longer talk to him. He proceeded into saying, if we could just go to counseling and get back to when it was good. If I would just try and not give up so easy….

My question that keeps running through my head is…. When was it good? Was it good when we first started talking online and he pretended to go to work everyday? Which was a three month consistent lie. Was it good when he moved in with me, and took off with my car to go get high and not come home leaving me carless with my grandkids? Was it good, when he was secretly talking to his ex, Ashley, asking her to come sit on his face while I was out of state at a work convention? Was it good when he would lose job after job because he would decide getting high was more important? Was it good, when he was supposed to be going to Manhatten to a football game with his son, and the day before he ended up at another ex house getting high all night and not coming home? Was it good on our wedding day when he was so drunk on moonshine that we didn’t spend a single moment together? Was it good when we got to the hotel after the wedding and he was so drunk and angry because he couldn’t get the bath tub to drain and started beating on the walls? Was it good when he told me he was going to fall river to go fishing at his bosses cabin, when in reality he drove to Missouri and got a hotel with the ex, Ashley?

I’m still trying to remember when it was good. Yes, we had good days, but life in general with him was not good. We had good days, good weeks but they never lasted. The lies, the drugs, the exes and the excuses always seemed roll back around. I used to tell myself that I wished he would get back to the guy I fell in love with. He was never that guy! That was a fasad. That was who he was to get what he wanted. It was a disguise. In reality, he is a compulsive liar, a sociopath, a narcisist and the person I thought he was does not exist. He was wearing sheeps clothing, when I fell in love with him. Ya’ll know what the Bible says about sheeps clothing. In the King James Version of the Bible the text reads: Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s. clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Now this is how I see it! I haven’t even touched on our life together, these are just some examples. I’ll get more into these and other indcidents later. But to be honest, I can not recall…. when was it truly good? It wasn’t.